Red 2 (2013)

As directed by Dean Parisot, whose last feature was the dreadful Fun with Dick and Jane remake, Red 2 -- the sequel to Red (2010) -- is like a tortoise and hare race played out with a hundred hares on a dodgeball court that ends in a tie. Parisot, or whatever office intern was allowed to do re-shoots, keeps the plot moving quickly, jumping all over the world (complete with major city title cards), to cover up its general nothingness. read more...

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Safety Last! (1923)

Many people today probably recognize that photo of a bespectacled man in a straw hat hanging from the hands of a giant clock on a high building, but the real trick is getting people to name the man or even the film it was taken from. read more...

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Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

When the summer of 2003 began, one of its least interesting cinematic prospects was a Jerry Bruckheimer-produced version of a famous amusement park ride. Now, as we near the season's halfway mark, this very same picture not only wildly surpasses its poor expectations, but also stands tall as one of the very best summer movies of all time. For me, the pinnacle of summer entertainment was Raiders of the Lost Ark, in 1981. It came the closest to capturing the feel of playing on a hot day, imaginations raging and creating adventures, chases, fights, leaps and bounds, telling feverish stories to friends. Nowadays, I can't reasonably expect a movie to surpass Raiders (partly because I'm all grown up) but if a summer movie comes anywhere close, I'm very pleased. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl comes very, very close. It moves like a sweet-scented and slightly ticklish breeze. read more...

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Another 48 Hrs. (1990)

Here's a strange case of expectations vs. reality. Eddie Murphy became a huge star with his acting debut in Walter Hill's 48 Hrs. (1982). By the time this sequel was ordered, he was an established star, and certain things were expected in an Eddie Murphy movie. However, the cult director Walter Hill also operated in a certain way, and what actually arrived in theaters was more of a Walter Hill movie than an Eddie Murphy movie, i.e. it was more of an action/crime movie than a comedy full of Murphy's wisecracking. Hence, most people were disappointed and branded Another 48 Hrs. a failure. read more...

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Jungle Cruise (2021)

None of this comes from lack of trying. The movie features an awesome set, an entire village on the banks of the Amazon, a place I most certainly would love to hang out. (The movie was shot in Hawaii.) The "Skipper," Captain Frank Wolff (Dwayne Johnson), runs his own riverboat tours there, taking tourists out and using elaborate, homemade effects to give them fun little scares. He fills out his patter, of course, with some of the classic puns from the ride. Unfortunately, no matter how much money he makes from this, he still owes a huge chunk of change to the grumpy harbormaster (Paul Giamatti). read more...

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